Below is a link to an article about Kosta Karageorge. He was a college football player at Ohio State who had a history of concussions, he went missing for five days until his dead body was found due to a self inflicted gunshot wound in a dumpster near his apartment. This story was very difficult for me to read about because I felt like I was in a similar situation. Obviously you dont know what is going through someone elses head before a tregedy like this occurrs. After reading about this, it all seemed familiar to me. After my third concussion and the realization that I would no longer be playing baseball forever and dropping out of school, I felt like a failure. This last concussion had me feeling more emotional and confused than any of the others I had experienced. I remember walking out my apartment door to a bench my apartment complex and I would just sit there and cry every night. This was very shocking to me. I didn't go outside every night for a week knowing I would, it just happened. Up until it happened each night I don't even remember being particularly upset, but I would just continue to break down emotionally without warning. I wasnt sure why I was doing it. I had no control of any of the emotions I was feeling. My head was so full of thoughts but so incapable at the same time. I knew I felt like a failure but I wasn't sure why exactly that was.I didn't know that my head injuries were causing me to feel this way,I just thought this is how I would feel from here on out. I felt like I was so exposed, like everyone could see inside of me and I was empty. In the article below Kosta wrote a text to his mother shortly before he went missing apologizing for being an "embarrassment" and that his concussions had his head feeling "messed up". I think back now to me sitting on that bench with the realization that concussions made me feel ways I never thought I could feel and Its a dangerous thing to feel this way. I look back to those nights of feeling like I didn't want to see another person because of the shame I felt, not seeing any reason to get out of bed, or look outside while the sun was shining, and I realize how important my mental health is. Hopefully this can spread some awareness of how serious head injuries can be. I am also grateful that the brain injuries I suffered did not lead to the same result, as it did for this man Kosta Karageorge.
http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/body-missing-osu-player-kosta-karageorge-found-police-say-n258611